Toxic

it's already 2:30 in the morning

i know this isn't the rational thing to do but i must let it out

i think i am drunk and i am all alone here in the room

and my tummy feels queasy

and i think i'm feeling sleepy

but a part of me wants to stay awake

because i haven't even drank 1/4 of the 750 mL bottle of vodka my sister bought for me

and i feel responsible for drinking it all up

because she's not going to drink it

and i was the one who insisted on buying a bottle of it

oh shit now what the hell am i exactly saying

damn i am drunk and i know i am pretty sure now

i thought i wasn't going to drink anymore

after i graduate, i mean

but what the heck

i've been drinking since i started my summer break

and look now,

oh shit

i think i have to repeat it again

i think i'm drunk

and i judt can't stop it

guess i need to have one last glass

i ain't got a problem

seriously

i just wanted to drink

drink and fell sound asleep

and not dream of anything

or remember of any of those freaky dreams

see, i've been dreaming of my chidlhood this past few weeks

and it's scaring the shit out of me

i see my gradeschool classmates in my dreams

and it creeps the hell out of me

oh shit, i've got to stop this

i'm drunk

and i don't know if i am even conscious of what i've been talking about

damn, i'm drunk